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Creating LGBT Families  ·    Property Issues for LGBT Couples  ·    Changing Family

 Relations for LGBT Couples   ·   LGBT Estate Planning and Probate Assistance

Creating LGBT Families

Adoption:  Second parent adoption, or "co-parent adoption" is the legal procedure that allows a same-sex co-parent to adopt his or her partner's biological or adopted child without terminating the first parent's legal status as a parent.  This type of adoption is much like a stepparent adoption in that the parental rights of the existing legal parent are not terminated when his or her spouse adopts a child born prior to a current marriage.  Most often, second parent adoptions involve two women who decided to have a child together and one parent is the biological or adoptive parent and thus the "legal parent" of the child and the other parent is the "second parent" or "co-parent" who has no legal parental rights or obligations.  This legal procedure is also possible for male couples, where one partner has already legally adopted a child as a single parent or has become a parent through an agreement with a surrogate.  Second parent adoptions have also been used for children born during a marriage or who already have two legal parents.  In those instances, a third party must relinquish his or her parental rights during the second parent adoption.

Currently, second parent adoptions have been approved by appellate courts in eight states (California, Illinois, Indiana, Massachusetts, Pennsylvania, New York, New Jersey and Vermont) and the District of Columbia; three states permit such adoptions by statute (California, Connecticut and Vermont); and trial court judges have granted them in over fifteen states (Alabama, Alaska, Delaware, Hawaii, Indiana, Iowa, Louisiana, Maryland, Minnesota, Nevada, New Mexico, Oregon, Rhode Island, Texas, and Washington).  In some of these states, like North Carolina, second parent adoptions are granted in a few selected counties within the state.

In 2004, the first second parent adoption was granted in Durham, North Carolina.  Since then, more than one hundred North Carolina children have been adopted and now have two legal moms or two legal dads.  The family must complete a home study, and there are many documents to be prepared and signed prior to filing the Petition for Adoption.  The process usually takes a few months to complete.

Some employers offer an adoption reimbursement benefit which pays for the costs of an adoption.  For most of our clients, second parent adoptions qualify for this  type of reimbursement. Also, federal tax law provides for an Adoption Tax Credit which many of our families have determined they are qualified to receive.

Our firm can guide you through the process.  To learn more about second parent adoption, please contact our paralegal Laurie Scott at 919-688-9646 to set an appointment and receive and information packet.     

Donor Agreements:   If you are planning insemination using a known donor, or are considering becoming a donor for a couple, you should have an agreement that spells out each parties’ rights and obligations to each other and the child. We are experienced in drafting Donor Insemination Agreements and other documents that define roles in complex parenting relationships.  This could be the most important decision of your life; you need a legal professional to help you with the challenges it brings.

Parenting Agreements: Same-sex couples who parent together face a maze of legal challenges.  A Parenting Agreement outlines the responsibilities and rights of each partner, for the duration of your relationship and, should unfortunate circumstances arise, when your family breaks up.  Issues such as responsibilities for education and school expenses, child support, visitation, life insurance and estate planning are outlined in a Parenting Agreement. 

Guardianship:  You may appoint your partner guardian of your child in your will, and in certain circumstances, designate a “stand-by guardian” if you are incapacitated.

Minor’s Health Care Power of Attorney:  This document gives a  non-biological parent the authority to make health care decisions for his or her child.

Friendly Custody and Support Actions:  This non-confrontational lawsuit can give you court ordered custody rights to your non-biological child, and should be valid not just between you and your partner, but also recognized by third parties such as schools, other family members and persons who provide care and services to your child.

Name Changes and Birth Certificates:   Taking a new name is often a sign of a commitment to another person.  North Carolina will allow you to change your name once for any “good reason.” Name changes have been granted for same sex couples who wish to have the same last name as their partner and children, but are allowed only once except as provided by statute.

Transgendered individuals may also wish to make a name change during their period of gender transition.  After gender re-assignment surgery, we can also assist with the process of getting a new birth certificate issued, in states where laws permit such changes.